


(Don't) Break Me Like A Promise

by NarryEm



Series: Broken Like a Promise verse [1]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Letters, M/M, Narry - Freeform, Reminiscing, Sad, Sad Ending, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-26
Updated: 2014-01-26
Packaged: 2017-12-30 05:45:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1014848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NarryEm/pseuds/NarryEm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on these verses:</p><p> </p><p>  <i>“Hey, you call me up again just to break me like a promise</i><br/><i>So casually cruel in the name of being honest.</i><br/><i>I'm a crumpled up piece of paper lying here</i><br/><i>'Cause I remember it all, all, all... too well.</i></p><p> </p><p>  <i>Time won't fly, it's like I'm paralyzed by it</i><br/><i>I'd like to be my old self again, but I'm still trying to find it . . . .”</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	(Don't) Break Me Like A Promise

**Author's Note:**

> Title and summary from _All Too Well_ by Taylor Swift.
> 
> Edit: properly edited the whole series because who needs sleep? :p

Dearest Niall,

 

There are so many things I wish I could tell you; tell you in person, I mean. From the moment we met on The X-Factor to our last days. Everyone wants immortality of fame but in the end, no one can have that.

We were young and still naïve in the society’s eyes. We could put on our grown-up suits but we were more of the kids playing dress-up. I don’t think any of us truly grasped the meaning of being famous (I’m sorry, I know you aren’t particularly fond of that word). I think that we took that as loads of screaming and sobbing girls and having handlers and whatnot. Remember how we used to say that we were five normal lads doing abnormal jobs? That was one of the truest thing I’ve said and believed.

 

Maybe the fact that we skyrocketed to fame at a young age is why we got caught up in it. Got caught up in the band and in us.

It’s weird, seeing how the fans see and believe what they want. They saw the friendship and family-like integrity for what they were but they also took it further in their heads. We were no strangers to it, as we always saw the proofs in posters and banners at concerts. Being the young singers we were, we pointed them out and had good laughs about it.

 

Then things changed between you and me. I was the youngest out of us but usually, people thought you were because of your over-bleached locks. You fit into that role well, the role of Baby Spice as an interviewer once said. All the other lads, too, I think we liked babying you and you didn’t mind that. But we went beyond that.

 

Remember when I went to Mullingar with you that one Christmas? I don’t even have to remind you, I hope. I won’t for the intents of this letter, which I might not even send. That was when I knew for sure that I couldn’t go back to the Harry and Niall from before.

 

I think that the most amazing thing about our career is that we never had to go through any of it alone. Even when we went on short breaks to go back home and stuff, it felt as though our band were with me in my heart; cheesy, I know. But you, especially, I felt you take up the most space in my heart.

 

I never understood when people say, or the books describe, that it hurts to be away from their beloved. I don’t think I can say that now nor can I describe what it’s like to be away from you.

It’s like the sun imploded. We are all used to London’s grey mornings but it goes beyond that. Without you, the warmth is nothing but a faint echo on my skin. The last words I heard you say in flesh plays in a neverending loop inside my brain. And, god, I can never forget whatever cologne you were wearing that clings to our goodbye hug.

 

So the first thing I did upon realising it was to kiss you. I must have been over-zealous and more nervous. My lips got the corner of your mouth instead and you laughed. You weren’t laughing when I tried again and kissed you properly on the mouth. Your face was frozen in that gorgeous smile, your eyes sparkling.

I knew I had made the right choice.

 

We knew that in our line of business, our relationship could never be out in the open. Sure, the fans always fantasised about the supposed goings-on behind the scenes and we played up the closeness between all of us. That never meant that we could ‘come out’ though. We weren’t foolish.

You always promised me the golden future. One day, we could and would declare our love to the world. One day, we would take romantic walks everywhere in the public eye and steal kisses. One day, we would have a baby girl (I know you wanted a girl and I knew I wanted the baby you wanted) to hold in our arms.

 

Then we found out that life really is complicated with many hidden traps and corners.

 

The album sales continued to soar with each new release and we never experienced any of that ‘sophomore slump’ or the third or the fourth. Being on the road for more than half the year surely took a lot out of us, but we were a family, all five of us. The lads caught on to us quickly and we never sought to hide it from them, at least. At that time, it seemed that everything we did brought us closer than ever, as a couple and as a whole in the band. The world literally was our playground as we toured around it for years.

Maybe I should have paid more attention in physics: what goes up must come down.

 

It wasn’t obvious at first. I brushed it off as the descend from the honeymoon phase in our relationship. I understood that everyone needs alone time and that there isn’t a couple who hadn’t once taken a tiny pause. It was healthy that we simmered down for a bit.

It was believable that our career was going great even after seven years and five number-one albums. Most of us were looking into settling down and starting families at that point and so were we.

I think that the first time we ever genuinely fought was when we were trying to discussing houses. People had caught up to us then and we hadn’t denied nor confirmed anything yet. And two band mates living in a house together wasn’t all that uncommon.

You wanted a small cosy house, something that could feel complete soon. I wanted a large house--pretty much a mansion, remember?--because I had always imagined that we would adopt at least four kids and have pets as well. It was stupid and got, it took some time for us to work that out.

Before we moved in, though, you called it quits, a week before we were set to sign the contracts.

You found your princess. You left me and our cat.

 

You were the one real thing that I’ve ever known and you broke me like a promise.

 

I didn’t know how we can work as One Direction so I didn’t. I didn’t renew the contract because I couldn’t handle facing you nearly everyday. I don’t think that the other lads minded too much, Zayn especially with his newlywed wife Perrie.

As you probably guessed, I’m back in Holmes Chapel. London has lost its lustre now that I can’t have you. I think I’ll enjoy our early retirement. Not entirely, of course.

 

Okay, I’m almost sure that I will post this letter. Don’t worry, I won’t do anything rash.

 

I love you always.

 

Harry. 


End file.
